Old friends

Hey guys!

I know I was supposed to see Matt today but I didn't. I went to one of our other friends before and than we were supposed to do something with Matt. But I get there and my friend is on msn talking to another one of our friends. It turns out that same day, our friends were having a reunion for all their program at our old school (and me, Matt and our friend were in different programs but we hung out with theses guys all the time anyways). So yeah we asked them if we could come and they said yes. So me and my friend went there but Matt had to do stuff at his house before so he said he'd meet us there later.

I saw alot of people that I hadn't seen in a very long time and it was really fun, we caught up and talked alot, joked around, watched videos. There were people who left early for some made up excuse cuz they were pissed off about some thing, I didn't quite get what happened, I just saw them leaving and was just like wtf. It didn't have anything to do with me so I just let it go.

Matt didn't end up coming he said he wanted to go to bed early. I was dissapointed cuz I really wanted to see him but if he doesn't want to make an effort to see us, it's his loss. We had alot of fun even if he wasn't there.

When it was pretty late and we were only like 6 people left we talked about politics and philosophy and surprisingly ennough for I'm not the one who brought it up, sexual orientation. Basically theres this one guy who started talking about his opinions about life and gays and adoption and he was contradicting himself alot. I still don't quite get what he really thinks. But I found out that this guy was bi or pan, something like that but he still thought gay marriage wasn't normal and that gays should not adopt. I found it funny that the person who was most outspoken against this idea wasn't me but one of my friends who, as I saw tonight, has almost the same opinions as me on almost everything. It was quite weird, like I wanted to say something but I almost didn't say anything because he always said it for me. But yeah, we had a lengthy talk that was quite interesting and made me reconsider how I think about some things like couples and love. I'm going to have to do some pretty huge-ass thinking.

Saying that, I won't talk too much about the convo because, well it's 3 am and I have to sleep.

So seeya! Goodnight guys!

Life is back to normal

Hey guys!

My break-up hasn't been as bad as I thought. I didn't start crying like a little girl (I did cry but not much) and I was in a sad mood for a while (still am) But I'm getting back to my old self alot faster than I thought. My friends have been there for me and really helped me get better.

I am going to see Matt tomorrow. I miss him alot and I know he'll be nice to hang out with. So yeah, I have that to look forward to tomorrow.

On another note. I still haven't talked to Alex. We said we'd stay friends but I needed some time without contact and he respected that. I really do love that about him, it's like he always got me. Basically, I think it might have worked out if his parents weren't so much against it. So there might be a chance of us seeing eachother again as friends in the future, and who knows, maybe we'll get back together once he's out of there, but that's a long shot and I don't want to think about it. I have to admit I still love him and I haven't moved on. I will eventually move on but right now I just don't want to. I don't know anyone who's even close to how awesome he is.

I guess what I want to say is, I'm getting back to my old self again, which is great because I hate my depressed self :P I'm also planning on talking to Alex next week because I miss talking to him.

I think I'll stay single for awhile unless an opportunity really presents itself, I'm not going to look for it at all. Being single is fine with me, I've been single for over 19 years, I think I can take it :P

Thanks alot to you guys for caring!

Love ya!

Who Knew

If someone said three years from now

You'd be long gone

I'd stand up and punch them out

Cause they're all wrong and

That last kiss

I'll cherish

Until we meet again

And time makes

It harder

I wish I could remember

But I keep

Your memory

You visit me in my dreams

My darling

Who knew

Guess who's single again

I am :/

I don't really feel like talking about it much, it hurts but I kinda saw it coming, I still thought he would try to see me again but yeah instead he decided to end it. I know we couldn't see eachother much, but I would still have liked to see him at least another time. Now I just feel like we had something good that just turned bad because of how far we lived and his parents.

I really hate that it ended like this. But there's really nothing I can do. We are still on speaking terms and idk, we'll see if something happens in the future when he's free from his parents... I'm not counting on it just cuz I really don't want to be hurt if it doesn't happen.

So yeah, I don't feel like writing too much so I'll leave it at that.

P!NK

I finally found my favorite artist!

After years of just saying "I love lot's of things but no artist really more than others". Well that's over. I recently listened to alot of songs from P!NK and I have to say, she is amazing. Not only is her music up to date and we can dance on it but it also always has a message. P!NK has something to say more than just "I'm rich and I like to party". She has songs that range from a cute sad love song, "Who Knew" and a song about a family that's breaking apart, "Family portrait" to a song to the president or about stupid girls.

It's hard to pick my favorites because all her songs are so good. I'll show you a couple anyways :P

This first one is F**king Perfect. It's a song about suicide, and has a very good moral.

I like the fact that it says that if that girl had actually killed herself, she would have missed out on the best part of her life and how she contributed to societe eventually in her life. so even when you think you're useless and that you're life is terrible, it's not true and we all have a future.

This second song is "Who knew" it talks about a girl's heart break after her relationship didn't work out and she thought it would last forever.

The third one is "Family portrait". It's a song about a little girl who doesn't want her parents to divorce and thinks its her fault. I love the video of this one.

I love how the little girl is the young P!NK but just is always there with her. i don't know how to explain it but it's really well made.

Finally this last one is "Funhouse" it has less of a message but it's a nice song and i love her countdown :P But at the same time it's about someone moving on once their life gets bad, you know moving to something else. Well that's the way i see it anyways :P

So yeah that's my P!NK post. She's an awesome artist and a good person. I think we need more artists like her. She's out of the ordinary but in a really good way.

Lots of little things

Hey guys!

First of all, I didn't go see my boyfriend in the end, he couldn't have me last minute because all his family was sick this week and they had stuff to do the weekend that they couldn't do during the week

So instead I went to a gay club with my friends and it was pretty cool. I danced like the whore I am... Okay maybe not :P, mostly with girls anyways hehe. But there were alot of things that happened! First of all Julien ended up french kissing some guy he had just met there (that I had met before) and that guy is, I swear, incredibly similar to me, we love the same things have the same kind of friends, have the same opinions, etc. So I thought it was pretty funny, I just hope Julien doesn't end up hurting him...

Also, there was a guy who was being too racy. He was dancing and took off his shirt and his pants and was putting his hands in his underwear. He was being really annoying too. So the security guy asks him to leave and the guy decided it was a good idea to resist. So they ended up fighting a bit and finally the guy got thrown out. No actual punches were thrown tho :P

And finally, the other thing that happened, when we were leaving we go outside and I see a guy that I went to elementary school with who also just came out of the club. So I asked him if it was him and I was right. So we talked a bit, we hadn't seen eachother in like 8 years :P After that, we went home.

That's pretty much it, yesterday also marked the one month of my boyfriend and me being together but we didn't do anything special :P We'll be on skype for valentine's day tho :) Which reminds me, Tman, I had something planned to give him when we saw eachother as an early Valentine's day gift. But I'll give it to him as a late one instead :P Thanks for thinking about it tho.

That's all, seeya guys!

Kind of a job :P

Hey guys!

I got a kind of job, which is going door to door trying to sell things. It's not the best thing in the world but hey, it's something...

So right now i have my days off and I work during the evening whenever I'm available. I worked monday and tuesday, I'm not working today however because I can't and on thursday I'll actually be forming another guy (yeah I know, I just started :P)

I hope I do fine, I wouldn't want to look like an idiot but hey, I just started monday, they can't be mad at me for messing up :P

Anyways, in other news, I might be going to see my boyfriend this weekend, it all depends on what his parents say. If they don't want to, I think we'll still try to work something out because I miss him like crazy right now and we haven't seen eachother for a month...

So that's pretty much it, I really hope to see him this weekend but if it doesn't work out, we'll work something out eventually. Thank you guys for being there for me, it means alot and I'll talk to you soon to give you news about if I'm going there or not.

Seeya!

Lazyness

Hey guys!

I don't know why but I'm having trouble finding motivation these days. I made my C.V. and everything but I'm not really going through everything thats necessary to find a job. Like I gave it to some places but I know I should have done more already and it's ridiculous how lazy I am being. Well, at least I still have money left in the bank so I'm not too tight financially. I still want to find something before it becomes a problem tho.

That's pretty much it, there isn't much going on in my life, I'm talking to my boyfriend as often as we can and I see my friends alot. It's basic stuff really but I'm happy.

seeya guys!