My coming out part 4 : Falling for my first guy

This isn't really about coming out but was incredibly important for me in both realising I was gay and not bi and in wanting to tell people about him.

In March of 2009, I went to the training camp in Florida for the third time. While there, I started knowing a little better a guy that was there for the first time but who paddles at my canoe club.

He was cute, but not in a way that you'd notice him, it's mainly his personality that makes him cute actually. After getting to know him I started to like him more and more, and at one point I realised that I had something for him. He was incredibly sweet, funny and kind but was immature, really immature.

When we left the training camp, I didn't see him for a couple of months and I missed him alot. It's actually when we were away that I developed most of my feelings for him because I thought about him alot and I missed him and his random jokes and infinite sweetness and really cute smile.

I talked about him to Matt alot, he was the only person I could talk to about this since Sab was really far. Matt really helped me in that period, being honest to him just felt great and talking about this guy with him felt right.

He was my one and only love interest until the end of the summer, even a little after, but I'll come to that later...